Fluttershy
by Koopa on a Street Corner
Summary: An oddball Boo detective solves mysteries for the Toad Town police force, while creating problems and wreaking havoc as he goes!


**Authors note: This is my first FF here! This is inspired by the T.V shows Psych and Elementary, and takes place in the Paper Mario world-map. It's mostly humorous, but I hope that it retains some more emotionally serious points as well. It's written in the form of episodes, titled Files. R&R if you choose!**

**~KotS**

_They call me Fluttershy. Why they call me this, I seriously have no idea. I don't even have wings. I mean, I'm a Boo. What kind of name is Fluttershy for a floating white orb with huge eyebrows and teeth? A bad one. Oh well. I work as a detective at my local police precinct in Toad Town. You'd think that I wouldn't have that much to do, considering that this town always seems happy and innocent. Yet, I have worked on hundreds of cases, some of which have truly been dastardly crimes. _

_This is a telling of some of my most notable work, solving some of the most intriguing crimes that have ever been devised._

**File number 1: The Curious Theft of the Vibe Scepter.**

_It was a dark and stormy night._ Completely serious; the rain pattered harshly on my roof as I watched the Glitzville Brawlers play the Shiver City Penguins. I'm always impressed by Koopinator and the way he shoots the basketball. I practice with my fellow workers a lot... But usually I'm the last man picked. Perhaps because I've never made a jump shot in my life. Anyways, my lack of athletic skill isn't what I'm writing about today. I'm writing about the curious theft of the Vibe Scepter.

As I munched on my Mushritos, my phone rang. I reached into my bag and pulled out a handful of chips. As I crunched these chips, I picked up the phone.

"Hello, Fluttershy speaking," I said in my most monotone voice. Well, monotone apart from my chewing.

_"Oh, I'm sorry, wrong number,"_ a female voice squeaked, and then hung up. I guess she must have been carelessly dialing. It happens a lot. Sometimes I do it myself. Once I accidentally called a health-care office. I was stuck on the phone for hours. Come to think of it, I could've hung up at anytime. Hmm...

As I settled back into my chair, my phone rang again. I reached for it, and answered.

"Hello, Fluttershy speaking. If you're a collect caller, go away."

_"Fluttershy, this is Sergeant Washi. We have a case to work on-and hurry down, it involves the Princess."_

"Right away, sir. Let me finish going over this report first," I replied, hanging up. There were still three minutes left in my game; the case could wait. As soon as Koopinator was done dribbling out the clock, I washed my hands, put on my trench coat and fedora, and grabbed my keys. I may only drive a Shroomdyai, but I drive like a pro. I navigate the bustling streets of my esteemed town, and arrived at the station quickly. I walked in and flashed my badge to our secretary, a young female Toad.

"Good evening Mr. Boostir," she cheerily greeted. Did I mention Boostir is my last name? I think it has a nice ring to it myself.

"Good evening, Toadetal. Where's the sarge?"

"He's in his office. Apparently there are members of Her Majesty's royal guard here as well."

I grimaced; these guards I knew all too well. They don't think much of the local police force-and less of us detectives, even though we're so efficient at solving crimes. Such is the life.

"Thanks, hon. Say hi to Toadile for me." Her boyfriend is one of the station's highway patrolmen. He's pretty good at his job; he's given me at least 5 tickets this year. Of course, I haven't paid for any of them. Maybe that's why he calls me a rotten scoundrel so much. Nah, he's just being funny.

I walked through our station's hall, down to the sarge's office. I could see him in there, along with a couple royal guards. He's a hulking red Yoshi-but he's got a heart of gold. At least that's what he says. I'm not sure I believe him. He might have a gold replacement filling for one of his teeth, but I don't think he even has a heart. If he does, it's all shriveled up and dried out. That's no insult to the sarge; he just doesn't have room for kindness or anything in him. Well, at least not for me.

After I rapped on the door, l turned the doorknob and entered the office. The sarge and the guards were all looking at me. None of them looked particularly happy to see me. Then again, I don't think the sarge has ever looked happy. As for the guards... I'll not waste words on them.

"You wanted to see me, Sergeant?" I queried, attempting to put a serious expression upon my oft-grinning face. Sighing, he replied to me with "Fluttershy, I called you down here for your help. The Vibe Scepter has been stolen from the Castle's official museum."

I gasped. The Vibe Scepter, while not the most powerful artifact that ever existed, was certainly worth a grand sum of coins to the right-or should I say wrong-person. As such, it was kept under heavy guard. If it had been stolen cleanly... I was not going to have an easy case. First of all, it'd be nearly impossible to steal something from the Castle. There are guards everywhere! Not to mention the security cameras, and the fear that Mario will be there to stomp your face in at any moment. If someone had been clever enough to steal the scepter, they were not going to be an inexperienced criminal.

"Our security cameras caught four people who were involved. Now the problem is that they're all guards-or dressed as guards anyways," one of the two guards noted to me. He was a bit nicer than the other guard, in my opinion. My opinions are always well thought and precise, so he should feel honored. Of course, as they looked exactly alike, I forgot which one was which rather promptly. Bah.

"Well... let me see the footage, if you don't mind," I requested to the sergeant. He nodded, and complied by clicking a few buttons on his desktop computer. I peered over his shoulder to look at the footage as it played. The slightly grainy black-and-white film revealed one Toad walking down a hallway, holding a key in his hand. The keys at the castle are enormous; why this is, I have no idea. Another guard lay on the ground, obviously unconscious. He proceeded to open a door at the end of the hallway; and after peering into the adjacent room, he turned and motioned with his hand. Two other Toads, dressed exactly as he was, stepped forward into view, and walked through the door. The reel ended there, and I turned to the sarge.

"Do you have the tape from the main museum room?" I questioned. He nodded, and with a few more clicks of his mouse, the footage from that room played. I could see a guard standing in the room, watching the area. Suddenly, another guard slipped up behind him, and knocked him out with a blow to the back of the head. The film showed the door opening, and the guard inside mouthing "all clear," before the other three entered the room. As the glass case that held the Scepter was opened from the top, the short Toads climbed onto each others' shoulders to have the top one open the case. Another jumped on top of the case, and helped lower the first one in. He grabbed the Scepter, and was helped out. The four proceeded to shut the case, shut every door, prop the unconscious guard up against the glass, and kick out a window which they escaped through.

The first thought I had was mostly irrational. "They were ninjas!" I exclaimed, waving my arms in the air for emphasis. The other three in the office stared at me, disbelief in their eyes.

"Okay, maybe not. I assume that this video explains the bruises you two have," I noted to the guards, who both looked surprised at my canny observation.

"Yeah... They got us both pretty good. Neither of us ever saw our attacker," one explained with embarrassment. I nodded sagely, and turned to the sarge.

"Sir... this tape has been more helpful than first anticipated. I expected more of a challenge in solving this mystery. I assume all the guards have alibis; so I won't waste my time investigating that alley. I would like to ask for permission to visit Koopa Village. I believe that the clues I've seen lead me there," I dramatically announced. The sergeant looked bored.

"Whatever you say. Go ahead. I'll keep my other detectives in town, investigating the crime scene, and following real leads. Go have fun out in No-where's-ville!" he said with a snort of derision. I knew that snort well. In any case, I nodded to the guards, and waved goodbye as I walked out the door of the office. Leaving the station, I fumbled with my keys, and then started my car to drive home. The next day, I would solve the mystery, I promised to myself. After I got my Koopa Village Kafe burger, that is. Best in the area I think. I could do some good investigating of excellent cuisine. And even better, the station payed for my gas! Whoo-hoo! I arrived at home, and slipped into my pajamas. Boos wear pajamas too, contrary to popular belief. I proceeded to fall asleep, where dreams of burgers and Scepters clouded my vision.

_**To be continued.**_

**Each episode will be in two parts. Thanks for reading!**


End file.
